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My journey into the kinkier side of life...

Posted by Kinky Betty on

A wonderful story from Belle, a great friend from the swinging world, on her journey into swinging and BDSM:

My journey into kink started just over a year ago. Well, I say just over a year ago – that’s when I actually started to do something about thoughts and desires that had been swirling around in my brain for much, much longer than that! Being from a “nice”, “middle class” (i.e. very vanilla!) background, I obviously believed that there was something very wrong with me for wanting to be restrained, spanked, degraded and “forced” - to be honest, even enjoying sex seemed wrong. Being in a long-term, emotionally abusive relationship didn’t help, nor did the fact that I’d been sexually assaulted as a young child. 

But, I digress! About a year or so ago, I had healed enough from those things to decide that it was time for me to explore some of these desires and dabble in the swinging and BDSM world. After all, I have never judged anyone for their sexual desires (as long as they’re legal and consensual) so it was about time I stopped judging myself. My first introduction to the kinkier side of life, was within a short-term, fun relationship where I experienced fisting for the first time (resulting in a swift purchase of a latex sheet to cope with the effects….!) and some minor domination. I found that submitting to someone else’s control was a huge turn on for me, as was a firm grip on my throat as instructions were spoken into my ear in a low, masterful tone. Sadly, lockdown restrictions curtailed this relationship, but it had opened my eyes and my imagination enough to know that I definitely wanted to explore the dom sub world and bondage further. So I did.

Before I continue, I must add the caveat that at all times there was a safe word in place, I was with someone I trusted and there had been conversations about limits. Consent was a crucial aspect, and feeling safe enough to let these new experiences unfurl. 

My first dom/sub experience occurred a few months later (restrictions had eased, isolation precautions were taken etc). I’d been speaking to someone I’d met through a popular online dating site. There had been a LOT of discussion about things before we met, and more when we were finally able to meet up. This turned out to be a one-off encounter, but dear god, we packed a lot into it! Over the course of a good few hours, I experienced orgasm denial, different forms of restraint – including a collar which, at one point, was attached to a hook in the floor to ensure I remained in the “whore position” (on all fours, arse up and head down), and being spanked for the first time – I’m slightly smug about the fact that he broke his cane during this, although I suspect it wasn’t a particularly strong cane to begin with! He dominated me with his orders, his voice, his actions and the air of authority that he exuded. Afterwards, he also made me a cup of tea and scrambled eggs (aftercare, people, it’s important!).

From this I did some research, and found a less mainstream, more kinky dating site. I explored the forums to learn more about dom/sub relationships, BDSM and the wild, wondrous world of kink. I’m fairly unshockable, but blimey, there’s some interesting stuff out there! Through this site, I met L. He has become a friend and a guide through the sometimes dangerous waters of this journey of being a sub. With his help, I set up a profile on another, pretty well-known, site. He gave me advice on how to spot Doms and Wannabe Doms (who are basically just bullies who are in it for to get their rocks off, with no care or consideration for the sub). Thanks to him, I’ve avoided a few potentially damaging experiences. He also taught me to deepthroat 😉

My journey continued with getting to know people via this site. I met a gorgeous couple for my very first FFM threesome. They are genuinely lovely people, who took the time to understand my anxieties, and to ensure I felt safe at all times. When we met, I didn’t feel pressurised to play – although, we definitely played! The whole experience was amazing, and they still laugh and tease me about my reaction to them using a wand on me. Again, something I’d never experienced - apparently the look on my face was something to behold! (Although, I do feel slightly bad that it may have caused some minor flooding on their bedding – if you haven’t figured it out yet, I am a squirter!). I’m still in touch with these wonderful people and hope to be for a long time.

As my confidence grew, I was open to trying more things – I had another FFM threesome where I experienced wax play and glass dildos (wow…. they’re fabulous!). I’ve been led out into the woods whilst collared and cuffed, forced onto my knees, face-fucked and fucked to the point of no longer caring if anyone walked past as I was lost in the moment, begging for permission to cum. Over time, I’ve learnt that I love to submit (but only in sexual situations) and I’ve worked through my need for degradation or humiliation. I still love to be called a slut and a whore, but I’ve learnt that the more extreme forms of these are not for me. I am glad I explored them though, and if they’re for you – go for it!

The last person I got chatting with on “that site” turned out to be a surprise. One of the most significant pieces of advice L gave me was “don’t go falling in love”. The majority of people on the site are there to experience something they may not be getting at home, are exploring their “dark side” or are just there for fun. As was I. I didn’t want a relationship. I was perfectly happy with my single status and the freedom to explore what I wanted, when I wanted, and with whoever I wanted. But then, I saw a profile that intrigued me. Being a bit nervous about the whole first message thing, I sent a wink and, to my surprise, he messaged me. Once we got chatting, we just clicked. The first time we met, it felt like meeting someone I’d known for years. And I can’t wait to see where it goes next. Sorry L, I went and fell in love…..

1 comment


  • Wonderful story Belle. Thank you so much for sharing. Anyone else please comment or share your own little stories

    Mr Betty on

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